Chapter 7.1: Sabishii wa Tsurai (Loneliness is tough)
Its been quite sometime since I last blogged, I thought nobody would really care until Ah Kit, message me saying "Dude how's life? U didnt update ur blog fer quite some time, lookin forward to updates" which tells me that they ARE people who are actually reading my blog other than my family and close friends. Its good to know that Kit is still reading my blog, despite we chat with each other online. But thanks to him i've got my motivation to blog which I had not have for this past few months. Before blabbering bout my life here in Japan, I want to thank Pei Chuen (PC) and Eric for organizing 2 different farewell parties for me, on the day I left for Japan and on the day before I left for Japan. For PC's side I want to thank Phui, Jia Hong, Kai, Kenny Yap, Mung Kit, Hong Chun, Jiann Yet, Chow Yang, Guan Shern, Yeong Shan and Pak Sun for celebrating my farewell party, although it got interrupted by my dad (AGAIN, as the night before, he interrupted my farewell party with Eric's group). Well here are some pictures
Theres plenty more, but a picture can say a thousand words right? Thinking of them never cease to make me smile. "haihz...with u gone now feel like missing a piece connecting us together.." - Phui said to me. It seems that now our usual group are split into 3~4 groups. I guess me leaving really did made a huge impact on our gang and the other hand, I miss them as well. Next is Eric's group, which is my college friends. The pictures seem to be missing (=/) but I will upload them when I can find it. Eric's group brought me to a place in Cheras where it was nice, as in a nice place for couples (lolz) and well yeah a nice place to think peacefully as its on a hill. So we went to eat steak, at that time, i've not touched steak for like ages and the steak tasted good (lolz) and halfway through, Trevor called to ask me whether I wanted to watch movie. I know he had no bad intentions but because of that, my farewell party got cut off halfway and by the looks of Eric, he looked very dissapointed which I felt really bad. Finally the people who see me off at the airport
Realize the picture that I took with my dad? Before reaching the airport I was telling myself to be strong, leave without tears, but it seems that when it was my turn to hug my dad, emotions tend to burst out. I guess at that time I was not fully prepared for that.
Thats for the whole farewell part, and as for my life now, I had been lost ,confused ,lonely and sad for the past 2 months. Lost as in i've lost my sight and purpose as to the reason why I came here. Confused as i've been easily taken into people's words seriously not being like my usual self. Lonely, as i've got no gang to go out with, people in my class seems to stay away from me except for some few number of people. Sad as in not being able to see my loved ones. Currently i'm having my summer break which is about to end this sunday. The day before yesterday, I was really lost, confused, lonely and sad until I intended to stop my studies here halfway. After chatting with my dad on that day about how I felt, my eyes opened again. I got back most of my motivation which I had lost a few months back, becoming more positive, I meant becoming more like the Daryl everyone knew back in Malaysia. This is my first time feeling very lost, I guess i'm still very weak mentally. I'd also want to thank Campos and Kindt, I really am glad that i've met them. Campos and Kindt are missionaries from a church in Kotesashi, Campos came from Brazil and Kindt came from Arizona, Phoenix, US. By knowing them i've met alot of nice people in the church. They gave me a bicycle, invited me for dinner, provide me transportation and helped me alot in many ways. Also i've been teaching English in this church as a volunteer for 2 months+ teaching conversational English. I've not taken any pictures of the people I teach but I will post it up here once I do. Oh and as for the girl that I posted in my earlier post, i've asked her out in the middle of May, she told me OK once her EJU exam is over which is on somewhere in June. But then after that exam over, she extended it to November. At first I said OK but then after getting to know her better, I realize that she isn't suitable for me, as from how I see, she doesn't seem to be the serious type and I somehow know that if I were to go out with her, I will feel disappointed. As to why I say so, 90% of the sms I send to her, it will not be replied, even though its free. Knowing myself, i'm a sensitive person, not replying for a day or so its alright as long as it is replied, but not replying at all, it shows that she don't have any interest. So after a week, I cancelled the date without telling her the reason. Actually its more like she ignored me rather than me not wanting to explain as i've tried to approached her many times and she ignores me. Aite, gotta go to bed already, its 4AM here in Japan and i've planned to go to Chinatown tommorow at 10am so gotta go to bed. Till then sayounara~!
"Ore, motto tsuyoku naritai... dou sureba ii?" - Daryl (a.k.a) Wiegraf, Vash and Urameshi Kiddo
Theres plenty more, but a picture can say a thousand words right? Thinking of them never cease to make me smile. "haihz...with u gone now feel like missing a piece connecting us together.." - Phui said to me. It seems that now our usual group are split into 3~4 groups. I guess me leaving really did made a huge impact on our gang and the other hand, I miss them as well. Next is Eric's group, which is my college friends. The pictures seem to be missing (=/) but I will upload them when I can find it. Eric's group brought me to a place in Cheras where it was nice, as in a nice place for couples (lolz) and well yeah a nice place to think peacefully as its on a hill. So we went to eat steak, at that time, i've not touched steak for like ages and the steak tasted good (lolz) and halfway through, Trevor called to ask me whether I wanted to watch movie. I know he had no bad intentions but because of that, my farewell party got cut off halfway and by the looks of Eric, he looked very dissapointed which I felt really bad. Finally the people who see me off at the airport
Realize the picture that I took with my dad? Before reaching the airport I was telling myself to be strong, leave without tears, but it seems that when it was my turn to hug my dad, emotions tend to burst out. I guess at that time I was not fully prepared for that.
Thats for the whole farewell part, and as for my life now, I had been lost ,confused ,lonely and sad for the past 2 months. Lost as in i've lost my sight and purpose as to the reason why I came here. Confused as i've been easily taken into people's words seriously not being like my usual self. Lonely, as i've got no gang to go out with, people in my class seems to stay away from me except for some few number of people. Sad as in not being able to see my loved ones. Currently i'm having my summer break which is about to end this sunday. The day before yesterday, I was really lost, confused, lonely and sad until I intended to stop my studies here halfway. After chatting with my dad on that day about how I felt, my eyes opened again. I got back most of my motivation which I had lost a few months back, becoming more positive, I meant becoming more like the Daryl everyone knew back in Malaysia. This is my first time feeling very lost, I guess i'm still very weak mentally. I'd also want to thank Campos and Kindt, I really am glad that i've met them. Campos and Kindt are missionaries from a church in Kotesashi, Campos came from Brazil and Kindt came from Arizona, Phoenix, US. By knowing them i've met alot of nice people in the church. They gave me a bicycle, invited me for dinner, provide me transportation and helped me alot in many ways. Also i've been teaching English in this church as a volunteer for 2 months+ teaching conversational English. I've not taken any pictures of the people I teach but I will post it up here once I do. Oh and as for the girl that I posted in my earlier post, i've asked her out in the middle of May, she told me OK once her EJU exam is over which is on somewhere in June. But then after that exam over, she extended it to November. At first I said OK but then after getting to know her better, I realize that she isn't suitable for me, as from how I see, she doesn't seem to be the serious type and I somehow know that if I were to go out with her, I will feel disappointed. As to why I say so, 90% of the sms I send to her, it will not be replied, even though its free. Knowing myself, i'm a sensitive person, not replying for a day or so its alright as long as it is replied, but not replying at all, it shows that she don't have any interest. So after a week, I cancelled the date without telling her the reason. Actually its more like she ignored me rather than me not wanting to explain as i've tried to approached her many times and she ignores me. Aite, gotta go to bed already, its 4AM here in Japan and i've planned to go to Chinatown tommorow at 10am so gotta go to bed. Till then sayounara~!
"Ore, motto tsuyoku naritai... dou sureba ii?" - Daryl (a.k.a) Wiegraf, Vash and Urameshi Kiddo
posted by ~£êŧ Мē ßē Ŵĩŧĥ ¥õŭ~ at 1:18 AM
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