Date error

Chapter 8: 愛 was published on the 2nd of June, not on the 28th of April =)

Chapter 8: 愛 (Love) [Ai]

I finally understood the feeling of being left hanging, and the feeling of lost. But I finally knew what its like to love someone who isn't my family, and until today, I have no regrets

I'm not blaming anyone, I just feel that I have to remind myself of this

It all started when I proposed to Sue Yen, asking her to be my girlfriend. After accepting, most likely because of the pressure she felt, she told me that she don't know if its the right decision. But I told her, that she can withdraw her acceptance and give it a thought. But instead she told me that, she made up her mind and accepted me.

We started off quite awkwardly for the first 2 weeks as we had double dates instead of a date between the two of us. I was abit unhappy about it, and told her about it. But as time passes, I came to love the Sue Yen whois, loud, cheerful, talkative, manja, and dared to take risk with me. On our 3rd week, which happened to be the most happiest day of our entire relationship, started off badly. We had a misunderstanding at first, but everything then turned for the better, when we had a 1 on 1 conversation. She told me that she thinks that I deserve someone whois better than her, and she wants to know what i'm expecting from her and that she will change for me. So then I told her that I love her for the way she is and I don't want her to change for me. If she were to change, I'd want her to change for herself, not for me. Told her that I feel like i'm giving most of the time, but not receiving. After the conversation, she seemed to be very happy after that.

We watched movie, ate dinner, went up a hill and had the happiest time ever in our relationship. She finally open up to me by telling me things that she wants to do together, as she doesn't open up to me at all until that night. And I somehow made her cried as well, out of happiness. Which actually made me feel happy like i've never felt before.

When the fourth week came, she seemed to be stressed with work, and I was worried and I didn't know how to cheer her up as she isn't opening to me about her work. I told her that I don't know whether I should cheer her up or to give her sometime alone and that I felt useless. She tried to call me the next day, but I left my phone at home. When I got back, I tried calling her twice, but she didn't pick up the phone as she was in a meeting. But she messaged me saying that she is alright, and that there is nothing for me to worry about. Which already give me the vibes that she is NOT alright.

2 days later she asked me out, I knew something was wrong when I met her and she isn't being the normal manja Sue Yen that I knew. She started to be very quiet and we hardly even talk about anything at all. Until I sent her back, she said that she was hurt because I told her that I felt useless, and that she wants me to take my time and think about it.

The next day I asked her out and talked to her about it, and tried to hold her hand, but she moved my hand away, and said that I needed time to think. So then the option that I never thought of came up to me, if whatever answer i'm giving isn't right to her, then I guess she wants a breakup then.

So then 2 days after that, I called her out, and told her that if we cannot overcome this problem, then we should just cut it clean here. She also mentioned that because of another friend of mine, she thinks that, to me, our relationship is all about calculation, and that i'm very calculative and that all she can provide me is money. When she said that to me, I felt so hurt, to hear that from her. Telling her that its not the choice that I want to come to but I really don't know what else she wants me to decide. So then she burst to tears saying that she had NEVER thought of breaking up, and that she wants me to think about us, but because I brought up breaking up, her mind was set to break up. But then I said, fine, if this is what you want. Then she said NO this is NOT what I want, this is because you brought it up. Then I told her that its NOT what I want, I want us to take off where we left off, and that all I wanted from her is to share with me her problems, thats the least I can do for her, even if I cannot do anything about it. She then started to tell me why she was sad, and then told me that by her telling me why she is sad, it makes her even sadder. And then she told me that she cannot absorb all of this at a time and that she wants to go back. After sending her, she said, continue this conversation the next day IF I want.

I went to consult with my friends, some of them said to hang on, and some of them harshly told me to breakup with her. But I believed in her and I really do love her to the extent that I would do anything for her. I don't give a damn what my friend or her friends says about her, they do not know her like I do.

I've never been so sure as to what I want other than going to Japan, and studying japanese, and told her that yes, I want. The next day, we talked and then she told me that she wants us to start anew, but with a few condition of hers, and I told her mine as well. We got back together, and I thought that we would be like before, but unfortunately she changed... She doesn't seem to care about me like she used to, hardly reply my messages, and when we hold hands, she doesn't even grip my hands. Its like holding a corpse's hand. I was fine with that, until my dad was hospitalized and I needed her to be by my side at that emotional moment. Telling me that she can't is alright, but not making up for it ticks me off.

So then I messaged her saying how I felt and I wanted her to think about us, and that i'm not thinking of a breakup, I told her that it takes two sides to make this relationship work. She then asked me to meet her, which I agreed. But then she took it for granted that I would be going to fetch her despite she was the one who asked me out. I asked her if she could meet me up at my place, but she said no, she doesn't want to go so far, so then I said, you're taking me for granted and with your current mindset I don't feel like seeing you. Letting her feel what I felt during the first misunderstanding, on that night itself, she sent me a breakup text message, which was read in the morning as I was asleep that night. I send her back messages saying that i'm dissapointed in her and etc. But then after seeing her post in facebook that she declared being single and that she felt so relieved, there is no point in me arguing.

So then I messaged her Thank you for the 2 months, and that my promise to her still remains, that is if she needs me, call me, i'll be there.

I didn't like the way it ended, but its what she decided and no matter what I do or say, won't change anything.

3 days later after the breakup, I was angry and frustrated, and then I thought I was fine with it emotionally, so happen to be our 2nd month anniversary, but on that morning itself, I dreamt of her. I woke up, and ended up locking myself up in the room, my tears couldn't stop dropping out the whole day.

Even until today, I still think about our happiest night, think about her and I still love her. She hopes that I forget, but to me, god gave us memory, so that we learn or cherish it. And to me, I cherish every moment that i'm with her, may it be happy or sad. Its tough acting like you're okay in front of your peers when you're actually not, I really miss her alot.

I believe in the future, we might cross paths again and if we do, i'm sure it'll be something worthwhile.

"貴方は俺の最初と最後の彼女になって欲しい" - Daryl a.k.a Vash, Wiegraf, and Urameshi Kiddo

Chapter 7.3: 成長 (Growth) [Seichou]

Well i've not been posting for quite sometime because one of the reasons is beacause I wanted to give my friends a surprise. Before that, the city that i'm living in which is called "Tokorozawa" had decorated the streets with beatiful lightings and decorations, below are the piccies~


Tree decoration near the train station


Street decoration

Well and on December 18th, the day that i've been longing for 8 months (lolz). That is the day that I flew back to Malaysia for my Winter holidays. On the 18th itself, as soon as I reached, we had a family gathering and dinner here are the piccies


Poh poh looks funky with the sunglasses (lolz)


Trevor baked for me a welcome back cake!


And on that same day, we celebrated Uncle Sang Kwi's belated birthday as well (lolz) and if i'm not mistaken this cake is also baked by Trevor

Oh yeah I forgot to mention that Arisa joined us for that dinner as well. As to who Arisa is, she is a Japanese that i've met here in Tokorozawa. She went to Malaysia somewhere back in October 2008 to do her internship in Sheraton Subang. Before she went to Malaysia, I promised her that I will take her out when I come back. Which I did (lolz). Yeah and one more thing, i've got nothing towards her, alot of people misunderstood this especially my Malaysian friends (lolz). She has a boyfriend back in Canada, and we're nothing but friends.

Later on that night, I went out to give my gang a surprise, as me and Hong Chun already had been planning this out for months. And I really want to apologize to him as he had to make a big lie just to gather them out without noticing that I am back. Exactly 1 week before I came back, he told the gang that he had a big announcement to make and he wants everyone to gather on the day I came back which they don't know, and they thought that something was wrong as he was very serious. He lied to them saying that he is getting married and well most of them had a little doubt of that as Hong Chun is well known in our gang as the "The King of Bullshits" (lolz). BUT, there was ONE person who believed him all the way through, as to why, at first that ONE person had a little doubt of it until, I played mind games with them as well, faking that I believe that this time Hong Chun is seriously getting married and that ONE person was the ONE who get all excited and he told me "Daryl, i've NEVER seen Hong Chun this serious in my life". Well it proved that Hong Chun is doing great at acting as well (lolz). And that ONE person is Kae Shiuh (lolz). When I surprised them on that night by just walking and sitting down on the table that they're sitting at Misai's place, they were like "OMG! What are you doing here!?" and "When did you come back!!??". It was really fun to see their surprised faces.

Aite back to the update, I actually invited my cousins to come for dinner on Sunday, but my mum invited them for dinner on the day I arrived from Japan. So we went according to plan, and then continue with the dinner that I planned on Sunday, well of course my treat (=D) here are the piccies~


Grandma and Ah Yee Irene, behind are the rest of my cousins (lolz)


Kor kor Lionel, Ee Chong, and Tua Yee Doreen (oh and the waitress~ =p)


Mum and Dad


From left: Ai Yee Irene, Wah Wah, Mum and Dad

The bill came up to RM1005, to be honest I was shocked (lolz). But it was still within my budget as I had RM2000 from all the work I collected. I actually wanted to use that cash to buy myself an XBOX360 but, well, at that time, as long as everybody is happy, then so am I.

Well I went back to my old night lifestyle, which is going out to SS2 and this is a view that I miss in Japan, the "Pasar malam" (Night market)



Next is celebrating Colin a.k.a "Mamat"'s Birthday (lolz) on the 23rd of December. Well as usual, both Trevor and Trisha are ALWAYS broke and I forked out cash for them again (~.~) here is the cake picture~


Well it was his birthday so I resisted the temptation of putting "Happy Birthday Mamat" (lolz) as he will definitely get angry

Next is Jia Hong's barbeque party at Pak Sun's house. Well if you guys are wondering how Arisa looks like, well i've got piccies of her for this occasion as I invited her to come along.


Arisa is sitting beside me, the girl in purple

Then on that night itself we went up to Genting, I was thinking whether I should go up there at first, but then Arisa said she wanted to go, so I haveta go, as I promised her that I will bring her to wherever she wanted if I am able to. So here are the piccies taken at Genting Highlands~


Some random view nearby the parking lot


Nearby the Rollercoaster


Jiann Yet


Me and Jiann Yet (realize that we switched clothes? lolz)


Me and Yeong Shan


Me and Chow Yang


Me and the gang


Me and Arisa

It was one of my most memorable times in Malaysia for 2008 as I was able to get into the casino, well along with Arisa as it was her first time as well, but she is already old enough to get in. We met Hong Chun and Terry in there and we played roulette, lost RM10 (lolz)

Then on the Christmas Day, which is on the 25th of December, Tua Yee Doreen "booked" me for a dinner (lolz). Its been quite sometime since I last had dinner at her place (2~3 years?). Well here is the picture of the food that was prepared for that dinner~


Yummy!

Then on the next day which is the 26th, I went to surprise my "Sie fu" Hui Ying, but unfortunately she found out while i'm on my way there as, Carmen was driving, so Hui Ying saw my sms on her phone (lolz). Well i've planned this with Carmen for quite sometime as well. More piccies~


From left: "Sie fu" Hui Ying and Carmen


Me and Carmen


Me and "Sie fu" Hui Ying

Then the next day, which is on the 27th, is the main reason as to why I actually came back, Sabrina's wedding. It was a surprise as well, but unfortunately it didn't go so well as to why, we weren't being entertained by anyone(we as in me, Trevor and Trisha), but congratulations Sabrina!


Trevor gazing


"Fatty" Trisha


Me and "Fatty" Trisha


Sabrina and her groom

Then on that very same day, I was forced to go down to Melacca by my dad to go for another wedding. Which was Brendan, my mum's Melacca's house neighbour's son. Well the wedding was better than Sabrina's as they got people to entertain us (lolz). Piccies~


Brendan and his bride



Then next is having dinner with my other cousins from my dad side, well its because they can't make it on that sunday, we had another dinner session with them, and of course, I paid. We had Bak Kut Teh, oh and its my first time meeting my niece, Leonie.


Bak Kut Teh!


Leonie

Then the next few days, Leonard's mum ask me out for dinner and we had Fish Head Curry! Well I didn't take any pictures while eating but after that I took pictures with Leonie and I took a picture with a rare sight of my dad (lolz).


Dad and Leonie


"Watch where you are touching!" - Leonie (lolz)


This time with mum

Then on the 31st of December, I had dinner with at Kau Fu Sang Kwi's house. And this is the time that I got really cranky as some of my friends that I wanted to spend New Year with was busy. So I ended up not going anywhere to celebrate New Year's Day especially Phui Thong, if you really call me your best friend, you could at least cancel your clubbing new year party and join us as I might not be here next year or the year after that. But I want to thank Jia Hong, Kae Shiuh and Hong Chun for trying to get me out but I didn't in the end. I slept awhile until 2am, when Swee Loong messaged me to go out for snooker, its been awhile since I last played snooker and had fun playing with Swee Loong. Then we went back at around 4am.

Even when I was sent to the airport I am very dissapointed with the gang, as not even 1 of them even made the initiative to SMS or call me before I board the plane. The only person who messaged me was "Sie fu" Hui Ying.

That closes up my 2 weeks of holiday in Malaysia.

Biggest dissapointment: Phui Thong, as far as you have responsibilities to your family sometimes you're being VERY unreasonable, and made me believe that he would be the "best friend" that I thought he'd be but unfortunately no, it didn't turn out that way.

Expected dissapointment: Guan Shern, i've heard about him changing alot, and now he spends more time with his new so-called "friends". I just want to be clear that I really used to think of him as a friend, but now, not even 1 bit, as his attitude now REALLY disgust me. If you're reading this Guan Shern, I want you to think, who are your real friends, who spent more time with you, who spent their high school lives with you?. Its definitely not your new friend, you know it yourself.

Faces that I see often back in Malaysia: Hong Chun, Swee Loong, Kae Shiuh, Jia Hong and Terry; I really want to thank you guys so much for spending your time with me for the short 2 weeks. I really am happy and glad that you guys took leave from work and time for me. Jia Hong, for helping me out when I had transportation problems. And most of all Swee Loong I really am grateful and thankful as I see him almost everyday ever since I came back until the day I flew back to Japan he spend most of his time to hang out with me.

Aite now to the life in Japan~

As soon as I came back to Japan I called Chisako, Fukuda-san and the rest of my Japanese contacts and Fukuda-san invited me for dinner the next day, which made me very glad. Fukuda-san and his wife has no children, and I guess they must've been lonely on New Year's Day as they don't have any kids to spend time with. I met Fukuda-san at the church and I really am glad that I went to that church even though i'm not a christian. So the next day, we (me and the missionaries and Kanari-kun) were supposed to go to his house but then he told us that his wife is not feeling well, so he brought us near my place and we ate Shabu-Shabu! Its my first time eating Shabu-shabu. As to what is Shabu-shabu, i'll let the picture do the talking~


From left: Fukuda-san and Kanari-kun


This time with me inside









And Fukuda-san payed for that delicious dinner, I really want to thank him alot as he is the only church member to invite me to dinner most of the time.

When school started back, I came across trees that looks like this



Well you can't blame me for taking that picture as its my first time seeing a tree like this and sides, its my first winter! (lolz).

And lastly, after watching "Hana Zakari no Kimitachi e" (a Japanese Drama) I got a new idea on how to style my hair, also remembering the tips that my hairdresser once told me. And the result~~~!!!





Nice eh? I even surprised myself, I didn't spend a single yen on doing this nor using a wax, and its my current hairstyle now.

Next is I went all the way to the opposite side of the Tokyo just to meet with Campos, the guy who I really thank alot because he is flying back to Brazil on February. Campos is a missionary for a church that is called "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints". Thanks to him I get to meet with alot of great people in the church also thanks to that I didn't feel THAT lonely anymore. Well he is with another companion at Koutzunomori near Narita city, we played basketball, table tennis and then we ate at a "Tabehoudai" (all you can eat) restaurant. Here are the piccies


From left: Campos and Pimentel


Me and Pimentel


Me and Campos

The next day, I hold a party for Na-chan and 2 other newcomers into our guesthouse. Well I totally forgot to take pictures of Na-chan and the 2 newcomers, but I took a picture of Erofy (lolz) and me!


Erofy playing the guitar, he is good at performing!


Me!

Finally as to why I chosed "Growth" as this chapter's title, is because, when I finally came back home, I realize that i've changed alot, i've grown alot during that 8 months. As to what kind of growth, I can't explain it well, but I know that i've grown alot.

Well sorry for the long late post. But till then sayounara~!

P.S: To those wondering about the girl i'm going for, her name is Matsuri, 19 years old. How I met her? Working together in McDonalds, but unfortunately for me, she already has a boyfriend. I did ask her out for a date, thats when she told me that she has a boyfriend. And being myself, I don't like to steal other people's girlfriend and therefore i'm no longer persuing her. Sides, there are always chances ahead =).

P.P.S: The new bgm I put into this site, I love it, its been playing on my head for a few days now!

"Mae susumou!" - Daryl a.k.a Wiegraf, Vash and Urameshi Kiddo

Chapter 7.2: 一生の宝 (Lifelong treasures) [Isshou no Takara]

Well i've not been posting lately due to my laziness (lolz sorry) and had been quite busy with my part-time job and study (not really about study =p). Well i'll start off with my birthday. Well 1 month before my birthday, my family sent me a birthday card which was kinda plain, but hey, its the thought that counts right? Well as for this posts, I am proud to say that I have people who I can call FRIENDS. I was kinda touched for what they did for me for my birthday. They made a fool outta themselves in McDonalds, here is the vid:



Well i'm not sure about you guys, but to me I was really touched till my tears came out watching this vid. I really want to thank Kae Shiuh, Dan, Hong Chun, Chow Yang, Jia Hong, Guan Shern, Jiann Yet and Pak Sun. It really comforted me and made me know that I always have a home to come back to. Well to me, my only priority was only my family, but now, both family and friends, obviously family first though (lolz).

Then on my birthday eve, Kan-chan organized a birthday party dinner for me. I want to thank her for organizing that party as in Japan, 20 year old birthday, is the most important year. Well in Malaysia we call it the "Key Year". As at the age of 20, they're allowed to drink and do whatever they want. Whilst in Malaysia the "Key Year" is 21 years old. So beforehand, Kan-chan already told me to decide what i'd wanna eat so I told her that I wanted to eat pizza. So then we went to a restaurant whereby they had an "All you can eat pizza and pasta" for about 2000yen per person? (Which is around RM60). Well i'm not so sure for the price as they paid for me. The people who came are Kan-chan, Fujin-chan, Doa-chan, Sensei and Suke-chan. Here is the photo of them:



From left: Suke-chan, me, Sensei (Nagai-Yuuko), Doa-chan, Kan-chan and Fujin-chan

Well I doubt you guys can hardly see Kan-chan's picture so heres a picture taken from her birthday:



From left: Jhoanna-chan, Fujin-chan, Kan-chan, Tama-chan and Eiko-san

As for present, Kan-chan and Fujin-chan bought for me a jacket, which was quite good. Well thanks to Suke-chan's "great idea" I ended up like this:



Yeap, thats me in my new "jacket" (lolz).

Aite next is my part-time job. I'm hired in McDonalds (lolz) being paid 800yen per hour (which is roughly about RM24 per hour). I've been working lately to get the things i've wanted, and the most recent things that i've bought for myself is the Nintendo DS. Also heres my uniform picture along with my name tag (lolz):



Uniform


McPork!

Well if you guys are wondering what my name tag states, it is "Dariru Rimu Jia Sen" pronounced that way as well (though it doesn't seems to sound right to me lolz). And well working here in japan is tough. As to why, they're tooo strict and you must always be on the move, no time to even catch a breath unlike in Malaysia whereby everything is done according to one's pace (not all though but most of the jobs). But oh well, thanks to that, i've got to make new friends. And most of the highschoolers from the age 15~18 are currently working there which is just what I wanted as most of my friends are older people which are late 20s and 30s.

Also, Aunt Mei from Australia came down to Japan, she, Uncle Ron, Aunty Cathy and Aunty Margaret. So I brought them to Yokohama, which is famous for Chinatown (where they treated me chinese all you can eat buffet xD). I brought them to the "San kei en" as well (well I can't translate this, but its a big garden with alot of old buildings, basically its a town where all the rich people used to live in the late 1800s). Here are some pictures that I took with them:



Me and Aunty Cathy



From left: Aunty Margaret, Aunt Mei and Uncle Ron
Both are taken in the train though (lolz)

Well next is Festivals! When it comes to festivals, i'd always hyped in my own way (as to why I say my own way, I don't really look hyped but i'm actually hyped lolz). Firstly, is Hoshino Koukou Jyousei Gakko (litterally means Hoshino All-girls High School =D). Sensei teaches in this school so she invited us (me and Taka-chan) to go to her school's cultural festival! Here are some piccies~:



Sensei



Sadly they're plenty of Middle school girls rather than High school girls =( (=P)



Sensei's in charge of the Marching Band of this school, and it happens that the Marching Band in this school is quite famous, so basically it was the school cultural festival's main event.

Next is the party we had at home, along with my housemates! But, somehow its like a nightmare to me, as to why, I just turned 20 and they're pushing me to drink, ALOT (lolz). Here are some pictures~



From left: Taka-chan and Sensei
Umph actually Taka-chan is a Korean, Sensei and Suke-chan said that he had the "Takashi look" so they decided to call him Taka-chan, real name (Park In Sang)



From left: Yoshikawa-san and Toni (nickname, real name is Hide something, which I forgot xD but he is a japanese alrite)



From left: Na-chan and the new person who just shift in, Kaori-san



Doa-chan (also a korean)



Last but not least, Mini-chan a.k.a Nuna (which means big sister in korean, as she is a korean)

Well in the end 3 person got drunk and knocked out which is Toni (KOed at the dining table which made me and Taka-chan had to drag him to his bed), Kaori-san (KOed and gave me a shocked as she drop right in front of my room) and Yoshikawa-san (KOed in the toilet lolz).

Next is TGS 2008! For all those gamers, they'd definitely know or at least heard of it, Tokyo Game Show 2008! Well i'll let the pictures do the talking~



My favourite company!



Dissidia Final Fantasy Limited Edition items



A close lookup at the Limited Edition PSP version for Dissidia Final Fantasy



Picture of FF: Dissidia's characters



Biohazard: Degeneration CG Movie

Well instead of coming here taking pictures of games, I ended up taking more pictures of chicks instead (hey, i'm a guy alright! lolz)









And some cosplayers that are some, OUTRAGEOUS and some that are cool







And finally time to leave =(. Before I left, here is the banner that I took~



Finally are the city festivals, one which is in Tokorozawa (the place i'm currently living in) and Hon-Kawagoe's festival (which was today)



Tokorozawa's festival (i've only got this picture)

Below are all Hon-kawagoe's city festival


Huge crowd @.@



Now THIS is a festival that I had in mind, stalls all over the city just like it is in the anime



This was delicious, Chicken Steak =D



Yeap... I LOVE festivals xD



Fox dancing...?



Haunted Mansion (600yen per person which is about rm18 per entry, OUCH! Didn't go in though =P)

Aite thats about it for this update, it is updated till today =). Thanks for your support and till then, laterz~!

Arigatou na minna - Daryl a.k.a Vash, Wiegraf and Urameshi Kiddo

P.S: Those who want to see more piccies, you can watch it here at http://www.dropshots.com/6Vash9 =)